Top 5 Questions About Divorce and Children

Divorce can be a challenging experience for any couple, but it can be even more complicated when children are involved.  

As parents, one of your main concerns is undoubtedly how your divorce will impact your children emotionally and legally. 

Our goal is to provide you with the information and support you need to navigate this difficult time and ensure the well-being of your children. 

What is a Child Arrangements Order? 

A Child Arrangements Order is an order from the court that details living arrangements for the child(ren) involved in the separation. 

This is a legally binding order which will detail where the child will live, when they will spend time with each parent and for how long this will be. 

What Happens if We Can’t Agree About Child Arrangements? 

It is not uncommon for parents to struggle to reach an agreement about their child. When this is the case, you will have no option but to make an application for a Child Arrangements Order through a family court. 

There are certain factors which the court will take into account which is known as the Welfare Checklist. This is used in all circumstances when making arrangements for children. 

The Welfare Checklist includes: 

• Ascertainable wishes and feelings of the child 
• The child’s emotional, physical and educational needs 

• The child’s age, sex and background  
• The probable effect on the child depending on a change in circumstances 
• Any harm which the child has suffered or could be at risk of suffering 
• How capable each parent is of fulfilling the needs of the child 
• Any other relevant characteristics of the child 

What Rights Do I Have Over My Unborn Child? 

This is a common question which is asked when the biological parents of the child in question are no longer in a relationship. 

Whilst the pregnancy is ongoing, the parent who is not carrying the child does not have any rights to make decisions related to the pregnancy. This is because an unborn baby is not recognised as a ‘legal person’ in England until birth. 

Along with this, there is no right to be notified or present at the birth of the child. 

Therefore, the parent who is not carrying the child will need to wait until birth before taking action to gain parental rights. 

Exclusion from pregnancy and birth can be a distressing experience for any parent. While it’s natural to feel upset, it’s important to remain calm and non-confrontational whilst any issues are being resolved. 

When Can a Child Decide Which Parent to Live With? 

In England, there is no set age which determines when a child can make this decision. 

When dealing with a separation, the court is under an obligation to acknowledge the ‘ascertainable wished and feelings’ of the child in question though this can depend on their age and understanding of the situation. 

When the child is young or lacking the required maturity to understand the consequences of their words, their view will not always be determinative in a parental dispute. Courts will therefore assess this on a case-by-case basis and determined what weight to give the child’s wishes. 

For older children and teenagers, their views are often given extra significance, and it becomes more difficult to act against their wishes. Though this still does not mean their views are definitive, especially if it does not align with their welfare interests. 

How Can I Help My Child? 

When parents are divorcing, there are many things they can do to help their children through the process.  

Here are some top tips to minimise the potential negative impact a divorce can have on your child: 

• Tell your children together. Despite the separation, when it comes to parenting, you should try to show unity and explain the situation clearly and calmly.  
• Allow your children to feel emotional. It is a big change for your children, and they may feel sad or angry, amongst other things. Whilst creating a good environment to minimise these feelings is useful, you should also allow them the opportunity to express themselves and ask questions. 
• Spend time with family. If your child has a close bond with extended family, such as grandparents or cousins, it is important to keep these relationships maintained. This continues the sense of normalcy and can give your child a good support network if they need to talk to people other than yourselves. 

Myths About Separation, Divorce and Children 

It is no surprise that separation can have an effect on the children involved, especially if it is not handled with care; however, separation and its impact on children is a topic that is often surrounded by generalisations. 

It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing these assumptions, but at Harry Suleman Solicitors, we believe in taking a closer look at the research to gain a better understanding of the situation. 

Let’s look at some myths surrounding separation: 

Myth: Children of separated parents don’t do as well as other children 

Whilst many people suggest that children of separated parents achieve less, this is often untrue and caused by other factors such as family finances or ongoing family conflict. 

Myth: separation will always have a negative impact on children 

As with many situations in life, the impact on your child will be personal and depend on many factors including their age, strengths and character.  

Sometimes it can actually benefit your child to separate, especially if there has been severe conflict. 

Myth: shielding children from separation will stop them from being hurt by it 

You may believe that the easiest way to spare your child from harm is to shield them from the process however, this is not always the case. 

Every situation is different. However, in many cases talking to your child about the separation can help them to adjust better and understand the situation rather than being left in the dark. 

Contact Harry Suleman Solicitors Now 

Navigating divorce with children can be a complex and emotional experience.  

At our solicitor agency, we understand the challenges that families face during this time, and we are here to help.  

If you have any questions or concerns about divorce and children, don’t hesitate to contact us. Our team of experts can provide you with the legal support and guidance you need to make informed decisions about your family’s future.